Coaching Call #113 – Fear of Sex, Intimacy Issues and Healing Childhood Abuse
This is one powerful call. Although it deals with healing childhood abuse that’s lead to a fear of sex and intimacy issues, it’s not a dark call. On the contrary. Proving that you can heal even the largest issues without reliving all the pain, we were able to affect a powerful shift without having to delve into the dark recesses of the client’s history. There’s loads of humor and we ended on an incredibly uplifting note.
The call first started off with the client wanting to release some unwanted weight, in order to better attract a partner. But as we dug into that issue, we quickly uncovered a fear of sex, deep unworthiness issues and some aspects of childhood abuse that had never been released. We deal with deep shame and guilt, explained the cycle of abuse, as well as some myths around what it takes to heal from this kind of trauma. We also laid out a concrete action plan for the future that will continue to affect powerful healing. If you have issues around sex, intimacy, vulnerability or have some unresolved abuse from your past, do yourself a favor and listen to this incredible, funny and uplifting call.
Topics covered on this call
- He wants to lose weight
- He feels that he would be more successful in finding a partner if he was thinner
- Why his romantic vibe and his weight are connected, but not in the way he thinks
- How his beliefs around romance and sex are actually keeping extra weight on
- How limiting beliefs protect themselves, and how your mind “helps” them
- Why people might actually choose to be fat or poor or whatever, without realizing it
- He doesn’t actually look overweight and people tell him he looks great, but he still feels fat. Why???
- How to use the subject of relationships (or any topic) to figure out what the limiting belief is (actual demonstration of finding the belief)
- He has trouble showing people the “real” him, and tends to put up a front of being perfect
- Why the fantasy of someone seeing past our protective barriers doesn’t work
- Why does he get friend zoned every time? My rant about what the friend zone actually is
- What actually makes people sexy?
- He’s afraid of sex – due to memories of sexual abuse from his childhood
- He’s done a lot of work to heal this abuse, but there’s a piece left that he hasn’t yet let go of
- Understanding the feelings of confusion and shame that come from having a positive physical response to being touched in an abusive situation
- The belief that often causes the most shame in victims of sexual abuse
- How the abused become the abusers
- Facing his fear of abusing others
- How long does it have to take to heal from this kind of trauma (the answer may surprise you, but will make you feel better)?
- Can he use the idea of sex (and sex itself) to heal his fears around sex
- Why would we possibly manifest these kinds of events in our childhood?
- The way forward – continuous healing (it gets better and better