This caller that her meditations feel really good as she focuses only on positive things. How does this fit into my teachings that we have to allow our negative emotions? Is she doing it wrong? Is this type of meditation just a way to avoid doing the work, or can this actually be helpful? Listen in as I give you the technical explanation!
Coaching Call #375 is out! The topic of this week’s call is: How Can She Be Authentic About Her Brother’s Transition?
This caller recently supported her brother through a bout of mental illness, and although he was receiving support, he decided to end his own life. She trusts in the process of LOA, and what is says about people being in a good place when they die, so she feels at peace with the choice he made. Her challenge lies in what other people think about her beliefs, because they are still having a hard time accepting that he took his own life. To others, her grief appears to be cold. She wants to focus on what she believes to be true, which is that he has returned to pure positive energy, but this belief starts to wobble when she’s around people who don’t believe this. This makes her question the authenticity of her feelings about her brother’s transition.
Is there only one right way to show grief? Should we brow-beat people into believing our views? Has her brother returned to pure positive energy even though he took his own life? Should she show up authentically when she’s talking about her brother?
Hey, my happy shiny puppies, this is Melody Fletcher, your go-to for everything Law of Attraction and Reality Creation. And today, I’ve got a treat for you! What follows is an excerpt from one of our live Q&A calls, where people just like you, students just like you, were able to ask me questions, and I answered them. And today, you’re going to get one of those. And, as you’ll see in the coming weeks, we’re going to be rolling out more and more of these.
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Caller – I just have a question – I just recently came across this, kind of, meditation that is like, it uses this technique of, obviously, from your body, just observe your thoughts and don’t judge them, don’t give any, sort of, don’t add any value to it. And, at the same time, yes, look for your – just send energy into your body, so you actually get out of your mind.
And then, when you get this kind of space where you just don’t have anything, and you feel just a kind of a void, and you don’t feel, like, triggered by anything, you can send out an intention. And, apparently, I’ve been reading testimonials that it really works. So, I was just wondering, I know that in this course we kind of engage a lot with negative emotion, and I’ve been doing it; I’m just wondering would that work for, you know, is there something we can try and use, do you think, that it will kind of backfire somehow? I mean, if I don’t address my things and engage with the negative part? Which, I’ve been doing, anyway, but, you know, this space, it feels, like, it’s very intense, but it’s also feels like I’m so sick of my story. And, I just feels like, I’m starting to get the meaning of the fact that it’s just a story and it’s bullshit. And, you know, I’m getting to that point where, it feels unfair inside, you know, living with all this stuff, and everything that is coming up for me.
I mean, it feels unfair, but it also feels like bullshit. I mean, it’s really, kind of unreal at the same time, so I’m really getting the meaning of the word it is a story; just a story. I just kind of felt inspired to try this type of meditation. But I was just wondering, I mean, is that, kind of, bad that I don’t look for the negative, I mean, that I don’t….
Melody – No! Here’s how we’d use this technique. Because, it’s not all or nothing, these are all different tools to put into your tool belt. And so, I think that’s a wonderful way of meditating because in the first half what you’re doing is, you’re detaching yourself from your mind, and you are understanding that you are not your mind.
Caller – Yes!
Melody – So that’s, you don’t engage with the thoughts, you just let them pass, and you are making a different decision. You don’t have to engage just because the thoughts came along.
Caller – Yes!
Melody – And then, when you get into a neutral place where you’re just not buying into that anymore, you can, then, set intentions. And, you can get a lot of very positive energy going which, over the course of the next days and weeks, will bring up all your shit which you do need to deal with.
Caller – Ok!
Melody – So, it’s not about constantly feeling negative; oh my God, please no!! And, you can do this to help get more energy going, and also to train you to not buy into what your mind is doing. Your mind is not in charge of you. And, that’s really great training, but as you kick out this process, things are going to come up. It might come up more specifically; they might come up more helpfully as you train yourself to become more discerning.
I would use this tool all the time, absolutely, it’s a great way of meditating if you’re drawn to it. But it doesn’t mean, you don’t have to do it at the same time. So, in meditation, when you don’t engage with those thoughts; but then, if you notice some patterns coming up, and you notice something that’s stuck, then, you can go ahead and deal with that outside of meditation. Does that make sense?
Caller – Yeah! Yes, it does. Yes, obviously, something is, kind of, like preventing me from really relaxing, and it just wants to come up, and I would notice it.
Melody – Yeah! Or, in that moment, you could just let it go, but it’s not going away, it comes again, and again, and again. So, you’re not really letting it go, but you’re just deciding not to engage with that in that moment. Which you can do in meditation, “I’m just not going to engage with you right now, but I’ll catch you later because you’re not going away, you keep getting my attention. I’m going to deal with, but I’m not going to deal with you in meditation because that’s not what I’m doing here right now.”
Caller – Yeah! I think that was the first thing – I was drawn to do the first thing, like, you know, just not train feels to me, like, something keeps coming up. And, sometimes, I’ve just been aborting the meditations because I couldn’t just relax. And, I had this thing coming up, coming up, coming up, and I just didn’t engage with it.
Melody – And then, if you can’t get into a good meditation because it’s coming up, then clear it; using the techniques you learned in LOA Academy. Clear it, and then you can go back and do the meditation. So, you kind of find your way through this, but if you’re drawn to this technique definitely do it. There is no right or wrong way, there’s only what works. And, this is how I would work with it.
Caller – Ok! And, I mean, the other thing…
Melody – Make sense?
Caller – Yeah, yes it does. And, one thing I wanted to ask about is this technique: If I get to that stage if I’m really meant to have a beautiful, good meditation, and you know, get to the stage where I actually feel gratitude, and I can actually just visualize, and I’m not engaging with anything negative, because just generally, you know, I manage to create this illusion, and I get excited about it and everything, and so – and I tend to it before I go to bed, so, it’s, kind of, really beneficial to me because I really can relax, and, you know, I know that nobody’s coming to distract me, and anything. Do you think I can actually, even, kind of, you know, re-program my negative beliefs, somehow, if I keep engaging with this particular illusion and getting very good energy from it, and very beautiful feelings, and not fake feelings, really authentic, genuine ones. Do you think I can actually….
Melody – Yes, and you could also – you can also, potentially, depending on how allowing you are, just burn through some of those negative beliefs just by focusing well enough on the positive ones.
Caller – Sorry, say that again.
Melody – But it depends on how allowing you are, and how much of a need you have to understand what’s going on specifically. The less need you have to know what’s it’s about, what the belief is, how it’s manifested in your life, how it’s been affecting you, the less need you have to know that, to understand that, in that moment, the easier it will be for you to let it go.
But I’ve certainly experienced going into a high vibration and feeling just a moment or two of discomfort as stuff was leaving on the way out that just burnt through. And you can get to that point by allowing this. Now, as you’re getting into that really delicious place, if there’s something in there that is bothering you, I would look at it. I would either just look at it and go, “Do I want this, what do I want instead?” That can often flip it right there. And, if that doesn’t work, then I would take a look at what that is, because, I mean, when I’m doing the work, I’m doing the work, and I’m doing all the work. Or, you can put a pin in it, and do it later, if you don’t want to mess up the deliciousness in that moment. But, often, these things can be quite quick if you’re using the momentum you’ve got going on the positive side.
You’re not going to be able to get to the place where you can just let things go without going through the process of learning how to do that. Now, that is your process, it might take you a little while, it might take you longer. But, you can’t be afraid of the negative emotion. You have to be willing to engage with the negative emotion. Not constantly, but as it comes up, you have to be willing to engage with it. And, by being willing to do that, and then, pulling yourself up using this meditation, you’re going to find that it gets easier for you to do, it gets less for you to do. And, it comes to the point where it’s basically a non-issue, because you’re negative emotion is subtle for the most part, and, kind of, just leaves on its own. You just allow it to leave.
Caller – Of course! No, no, I understand. I mean, if I can be honest with you, I just think that, I just get this feeling that, somehow, first of all, to be honest, I’m not, I’m at a stage where I not even interested anymore where they come from. And, second of all, it’s like I think they’re so practiced, they’re so, so practiced that it takes another practice to cancel them out, possibly, I don’t know.
Melody – So, yeah, I mean, like I said, I would trust – first and foremost, I would trust that you’re drawn to this technique. Just trust that, and go do it. Just try it! And, I’ve given you some guidelines on how to work with it, but for the most part, do what works for you. And then, if you get stuck, go back to what I said here today. But, I think, it feels very good, it feels very powerful; I think, this is going to give you the next piece. And, it’s good that you don’t really care what it’s about anymore because you’re kind of sick of it, and that’s great. And so, I think this is going to serve you well. I think, getting some positive, real positive momentum going in your life is going to help you a lot.
Caller – Ok!
Melody – To pull you out of some of these patterns much more easily.
Caller – Yeah, I was just – because, obviously, yeah, I definitely honor the fact that I need to be aware, and I want to be aware, I mean, otherwise, everything is pointless. I mean, I wouldn’t even be having this conversation if I don’t want to be aware. So, I don’t want to be numb, but I don’t need to be in denial, and I’ve never been in denial. Actually, I’ve been quite lazy with books you see on meditating, so far, but now, I feel, like, I just need a different practice, like, I just need to practice.
Melody – Yeah! And, you’ve already been drawn to one; go do it! Go do it; it’s going to serve you.
Caller – Ok!
Melody – This is how it happens; this is how inspiration happens, it’s just easy.
Caller – Ok!
Melody – it just locks right in. Hello – here’s a technique. Really, shouldn’t I keep searching? No, it came to you.
Caller – Perfect!
Melody – Yeah?
Caller – Ok! Yeah!
Melody – It’s all going really well. Keep going!
Caller – Ok! Ok!
Melody – Yeah?
Caller – Alright!
Melody – Alright!
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