Have you ever tried to change a situation you didn’t like, through energy work, only to have it NOT work out? Yeah… we all have. That’s when we need to trouble shoot. And that’s exactly what we’re doing in this week’s Q&A excerpt.
The technical, nitty-gritty understanding of how reality creation works isn’t really necessary… UNTIL you get in trouble, that is. When the process isn’t working perfectly, it’s time to get a little more pedantic. Listen in as we dissect how to troubleshoot your manifestation, as well as cover some of the most pervasive pits you can fall into as you do this work. For example, why does simply changing your thoughts sometimes work, while at other times, it totally doesn’t? And what can you do instead?
Watch today’s short video to find out!
Coaching Call #370 is out today! The topic of this week’s call is – How Can She Stop Trying To Fix People?
This caller is owed money from a person she’s known for many years and who she’s very close with. But, instead of taking responsibility for fixing the situation, she’s blaming herself for the actions of this person. She’s been advised to take him to the small claims court to get her money, but she doesn’t want to do this because she cares too much about his feelings and not her own. In fact she cares about everyone she meets and she wants to try to uplift them as best as she can. Her desire to help everyone is now beginning to feel like an obligation to her.
Why is she struggling to take control of the situation between herself and this man? What’s the difference between taking blame and taking responsibility? Why does she blame herself for his actions? As lightworkers are we responsible for uplifting everyone and anyone? And, do we have an obligation to put other people’s feeling before our own?
Listen in to find out more!
This call is for you if you want to know the difference between blame and responsibility, and if you also want to know how to help others without it diminishing your own needs.
Hey, my happy shiny puppies, this is Melody Fletcher, your go-to for everything Law of Attraction and Reality Creation. And today, I’ve got a treat for you! What follows is an excerpt from one of our live Q&A calls, where people just like you, students just like you, were able to ask me questions, and I answered them. And today, you’re going to get one of those. And, as you’ll see in the coming weeks, we’re going to be rolling out more and more of these.
And, if you’d like the chance to be a part of one of these Q&A calls, for free, then stay until the end of the video, and I’m going to tell you exactly how to do that.
Alright, I’ll see you on the other side!
Caller – I’m here! Hey!
Melody – Hello!
Caller – Well, just about everybody’s asked some version of my question, but, maybe if I ask it in a different way, we’ll get another twist on it.
Melody – Ok!
Caller – I absolutely love how you’re teaching this. It just helps bridge, I think, for a lot of people it’s a great bridge you’re building. But, I – and I truly believe this, wholeheartedly, I see my synchronicities all the time; I believe it’s happening. I’m trying, have been trying for a long time to become financially independent because I’ve been dependent on my husband’s income. We’re divorced; I don’t want to worry whether he’s going to ever pay me, or not. And I get so worried that I’m not capable, which I know is bullshit. But I can see the evidence, I can build, and say this is all happening; all these wonderful things are coming together. I’m a life coach, I’m a reiki master; I’m teaching energy work. And I’m finding a lot of people interested in my work, and I’m getting more and more affirmations. It’s fun when I’m doing it right. But then, something will happen where I’ll see money’s not coming the way I want it to. Even on something like, my family’s selling a piece of property, and the property – because I live in California, and because of the capital gains, I’m going to get, like, half of what everybody else in my family is going to get.
And so, the message to me is – you are less than, you’re not doing it right. And I know this is just my thinking, but I need some extra hints to how to get back to: It’s absolutely heading in the right direction.
Melody – Ok! So, it’s not just your thinking.
Caller – Ok!
Melody – This is one – and I know I get so pedantic about this point, and you know, sometimes I have people ask me, well what does it matter? It matters when you get in trouble.
Caller – Yeah!
Melody – It matters when you can’t make it work. It doesn’t matter if it’s all working fine out for you; then it doesn’t matter; the order, in which, things happen. But it matters when something breaks down because when you’re doing the troubleshooting, then the details freakin’ matter.
Caller – Yeah, yeah, yeah!
Melody – Plus, I’m just pedantic, so, ha! Detail oriented!! Exacting!!
Caller – Good!
Melody – So, it’s not just your thoughts. Your thoughts are stage 3 manifestations. So, it starts with focus, and then, the second stage is emotion. Your focus causes emotion, and then, stage 3 is where thoughts, memories and ideas come in; memories as well, by the way. And, stage 4 is synchronicities – small, easy to miss and dismiss manifestations that are usually meaningful only to you. And then, stage 5 is where you get big manifestations and action.
Caller – Ok!
Melody – Action is stage 5; it comes at the end, you’ve got to build a progression. This is what we call the progression of a manifestation. Right? It’s in my book, it’s in my course, it’s on my blog; it’s everywhere. And, by the way, anyone who hasn’t read my book – read my fucking book, it’s all in there!!
Caller – I’ve even taught your book!! So; ha-ha! This is good; just keep telling me this.
Melody – That’s how I wrote it; to pack it all in there. So people are like: “How do you do this?” – Read the book….
And so, this is the progression of manifestation. So, those thoughts – when you just say, it’s my thoughts, that’s a stage 3 manifestation You want to start one before that, because anything you can do to bring it down to the focus – what am I focusing on – will help you change the entire progression. Now, we can’t really work with focus alone because we have to have some kind of feedback. Like putting a laser against the wall, we don’t really know exactly where the laser’s pointing until we see the red dot. That’s the feedback we need. Right? Well, you can get it with emotions. That doesn’t mean that you can’t work with your thoughts, but if you are blaming your thoughts, and you’re trying to think different thoughts and you have resistance that’s too big, you will not be able to. And, you’ll think you just have willpower problems. Now, if the resistance is not big, and you have the intention to think better thoughts, you can re-focus yourself.
And so, that is why it does sometimes work, but when you get in trouble and it’s not working, that’s when we really need to understand that progression, and that order. And so, if you don’t change your energy, you’re not going to be able to attract different thoughts. Thoughts are manifestations.
And so, you have to really pay attention to your feelings. This is why what I teach is awareness of feelings. You want to be aware of how something feels when you are going through it, instead of beating yourself up. Which, it’s still a very intellectual way of working, which doesn’t really get you all the way there. It helps to understand it, but that’s not the actual work. The understanding is not the work; it’s the prep, it’s the preparation you need to be able to do the work.
And so, you want to allow yourself to actual feel the discomfort of whatever thought, instead of dismissing it and saying, “No, no!! Bad thought; bad thought, don’t want to think that thought.” Think it for a minute; feel it. Feel the discomfort of it. Feel the ugliness of it. What are you doing in that moment? You’re engaging with that energy, which means, you’re going to get more data. You’re actually controlling the progression. You’re letting it progress just a little bit further. Doesn’t mean it’s going to hit a manifestation instantly. You’re getting more data. And then, that data you can use, using various tools that you probably already have in your tool bit, if you’re teaching this, to shift that energy, that underlying energy.
But you don’t even know what it’s about until you’ve engaged with it a little bit, and you engage with it by feeling it. And, it’s uncomfortable; it’s ugly, it’s uncomfortable. It’s not suffering – don’t torture yourself, but it’s uncomfortable. You don’t want to go there, but I’ve been saying to my students lately, a couple of minutes of discomfort to save yourself years of torture. Isn’t that freakin’ worth it?
Caller – Yeah! This is fabulous because what I’ve been doing is trying to go back to the emotion of what I want to feel when I have what I have, as opposed to….
Melody – Then you have to feel the emotion of the resistance.
Caller – Yeah, get it! Ok, yes, ok, good. So, I’m going to sit with that, and feel the misery of it, and see what it tells me. Is that what I’m doing because I don’t to intellectualize that part, I want to be able to….
Melody – Yeah, so, I mean – this is why I created an entire course that took us 10 weeks to fully teach. I mean, it’s a 6 weeks course, but with bonuses and extras and blah, blah, blah; it was 10 weeks of teaching. And, that was LOA Academy, which teaches exactly how to do this. So, the gist of it is – because I can’t give you all that education in 5 minutes – and I’m not afraid to tell you anything, because I’m not afraid I’m going to give it all away. If I could give it away in 5 minutes, it wouldn’t have been worth anything.
And so, what you want to do is: You want to actually sit with that feeling and you’re going to get more data. And, the data that you get, and the form in which it takes – that determines what you do next. So, you might have a memory come up, and the key here is that you do not dismiss what comes up as: “Oh, well, that memory – I don’t know why that memory just came up. That doesn’t have anything to do with anything.” I promise you it freakin’ does. It might not be logical, but it’s related because it came on that frequency.
Caller – Yeah!
Melody – It might be an insight – it might be a memory; it might be an idea. There’s all kinds of different ways. It could be a bodily sensation that comes up. But, some kind of data’s going to come up. And, that determines what you do next. And there’s different techniques that you can use.
And, basically, what you want to do is: You want to give it credence instead of putting it away. You want to really look at it. So, instead of dismissing the memory – “Oh, well, that was just me as a little kid. No!! I was hurt, something happened, and let me go ahead and look at it.” And, you want to bring compassion to it. And, there are all kinds of techniques that you can use. Depending on what comes up. But, basically, what you want to do is: You want to be compassionate about it with yourself, and not just push things away because: “No, no; no! That’s not right.” You know that, that doesn’t work.
Caller – Yeah!
Melody – And so, you basically say, “Yes, yes, yes, come on in. Yes, yes, memory, come on in. Yes, yes, feeling, come on in. Yes, yes, sensation, come on in. I want to know what this is about.”
Because, ultimately, the better you get at this, the more accomplished you get at this, the more trusting and believing you are, the easier this gets, because you can shift energy without even knowing what it is. You could feel some discomfort, open completely up to it, and it just leaves you, and you’re done in 30 seconds, and you never even knew what it was, but you’re in a new reality.
Caller – Ok! Good! So, I don’t even need to solve whatever that childhood trauma was? Or whatever brings up that self-worth issue in? It doesn’t matter, just sit with it, let it release, let it move through you; recognize it.
Melody – Everything that I teach is about surpassing that ultimately. Surpassing, going around the idea that you have to figure out what it’s about, where it came from; and just shifting that motherfucker out, so that you don’t have to deal with it anymore, so that you can be free of it.
And, I think, more and more, as I see my development, the development of my students, development of my teaching, we’re going in that direction more and more, as people are ready for it, that we don’t have to have so much of an intellectual explanation. Because, you’re not going to find the origin anyway because it’s not like you came in as a blank slate, and then bad shit happened to you and you made decisions. You didn’t come in as a blank slate; you came in and picked up a ton of energy that you wanted to transmute. Your starting point was not neutral. And so, who knows where the origin of that was. It’s just energy that you picked up; that maybe, you can remember the first time that, that was represented to you in some way. “Daddy yelled at me. Mom did this, whatever.” Right? But, that’s not the origin of it; you’re never going to find the origin of it.
And so, you just want to shift it out. And, really, I mean, I know this is a gross metaphor, but I love using it: It’s really like taking a poop! You don’t think about it, do not dissect it; you don’t have to go through it, before or after. Just poop!!
Caller – Hehe! Ok!
Melody – Yeah?
Caller – I get it, yeah!
Melody – Yeah? You don’t have to argue with it. You don’t have to know that much about it! Nobody does that with their poop. Well, I mean, there’s one lady in England who does a show who does it. Yuck!! And I know, all the English people know who I’m talking about, I forget her name. But she goes through people’s poop on a television show to try to figure out if there’s any useable data there. There isn’t by the way!
But, you know, it’s like – nobody does that. You don’t sit and argue with yourself. “Oh, before I can poop, I need to know what I’m pooping out.” No you don’t. Better out, than in. You trust that process; and most people understand that. And, this is the same; it’s like taking an emotional poop. Better out, than in; you don’t even really know what it is, just let it go.
And, all the intellectual teaching that I do is to get somebody to the point where they can do that.
Caller – Yeah! That makes sense.
Melody – It gets easier, easier and easier.
Caller – And, in that too – because this is where I’ll talk down to myself. I’m shifting my vibration because I’m allowing that energy.
Melody – Yes! And, it’s one of the biggest fallacies in Law of Attraction work that you’re not supposed to feel negative emotion. And, it shuts everything down. You start the process by going for the frequency of what you want, that’s the good feeling thing. And, you keep the process going by doing that periodically. But, what it does, is, it brings up everything that contradicts that. And that’s negative emotion; that’s negative emotion. And now, you’ve got to take a look at that. It’s, kind of, like, you want to renovate a house, and then, you open up the wall, and you see termites and mould behind it and you go, “Nope!” I don’t want to see that; let’s just paint over that!! You don’t want to do that! You’re going to have to tear that wall open; you’re going to have to deal with that. Otherwise, it’s going to cause more problems down the line.
And, yeah, maybe in that moment you don’t want to: “I wish I didn’t have termites and mould!!” But you do. You do! And so now, you’ve got to deal with it. And, that’s the part where you take responsibility. Not blame, but responsibility for what’s going on in your life. “This is what it is. I have this negative emotion. “I am resentful of my father. That is what is. Those are my termites; I’ve got to take a look at that.”
Caller – Yeah! Fantastic!! Thank you.
Melody – You’re welcome; you’re welcome. Did I answer your question?
Caller – I think so! Yeah!
Melody – Good!
Caller – I’ll call you back if I don’t get passed that one. Ok?
Melody – Good, good!
Caller – I’m expecting great things though. Hehe!
Melody – Good, good! Well, I’m glad to help. I love your home, it’s very serene behind you.
Caller – Thank you!
Look at you; you made it all the way to the end of the video!! Good for you!
So, if you’d like a chance to be part of these Q&A calls that we do, for free, then all you have to do is get onto my email list. People on my email list get free gifts like this. In fact, I’ll even give you another free gift for getting onto my email list, which changes periodically, so I’m not going to tell you what it is, so I can just change it, but just check the description down below, get onto my email list, get your valuable free gift, and you will be invited to take part in one of these Q&A calls yourself, where you can ask me whatever you want.
Sound like a good deal? I think so!!
So, sign up now; get invited to a Q&A call, and get your own answers. Until then, enjoy the videos every week.
Thank you for bringing your light to the world.