My Little Secret: Why the Law of Attraction Works So Well For Me

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Today’s post is a guest post by Mollie Player of

Lately, I’ve been hearing tons and tons of stories from people who believe in the law of attraction and have witnessed its transforming power in their lives. And after all this reading, and a lot of pondering, too, I couldn’t help but start to notice the threads—the little themes that seem to weave through so many of these experiences. And so, today, I’d like to share what I believe to be the most prevalent and most powerful of those common threads, namely:

When using the law of attraction, you gotta relax just a little.

Now, the word “relax” isn’t always seen as a good thing—not in spiritual circles, anyway. A lot of times, we well-meaning believers encourage each other to “pray more,” “say more affirmations,” or “try this new technique.” And it’s not just other people—people who’ve been doing this for a long time and are much more experienced, spiritually-speaking, than I.

I do it, too.

Since discovering the law of attraction, in fact, I’ve talked about it and the practices that accompany it to almost everyone I know well. I’ve even told some of them very personal stories about how saying affirmations and praying has changed my life in an effort to help them emulate my success.

But there’s one thing that I don’t always get around to mentioning in these conversations, though I should. And that is:

I’m not really working that hard.

Sure, it sounds like I am. I’m praying, and meditating (a little, anyway—why is it so hard to sit still??). I’m keeping a journal of affirmations. But I’ll tell you something: When an affirmation feels right—and when what I am praying for “comes true,” so to speak—it’s really not a struggle. A lot of times, in fact, the affirmations I repeat more often, and try harder to believe, are the ones that don’t work out at all.

Is this my inner Divine signaling to me that I’m asking for something She knows that I don’t need?


Very possibly.

Or maybe it’s just the fact that I feel that I need it so much, that makes it less useful for me to have.

An example for you:

This week, I posted a story on my blog about attracting more money into my life. Now, don’t get me wrong: I wanted that money. But did I feel that I needed it?

Well, no.

When I was saying the affirmation about it, I simply said it—and then moved on. My attitude was: If this is the right thing for me right now, it will happen. And if not, I am still complete, whole and happy without it.

And so, that’s my little advice for the day. I encourage you, dear readers, to try this thing called “relaxation.”

I know it’s hard. But it shouldn’t be.

Really, praying should be the easiest thing in the world, right?

It should be light. It should be enjoyable. It should be uplifting.

And it should help us let go of our need to control things, rather than increasing it.

Try it, and let me know what you think.

Blessings and love,

Mollie Player

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  • I’m. In. Heaven.

    Best LoA post I’ve read in awhile.

    When I started LoA — and for a long, long time after — my high-IQ, hyper-intelligent, Virgo-mind had me diving in with so much intensity + focus it’d frighten people.

    I absorbed and habituated about a million ins-and-outs of LoA and can generally run circles around anyway in any ‘discussion’ of it and most practice.


    And here’s a *huge* but…

    The gift that my intelligence, focus, and go-the-extra-mile leanings were… was also a ‘brutal’, ‘painful’ deal-breaker for much of the ‘impressive’ manifestation people seek.


    Because all that study, practice, and semi-perfectionism wasn’t relaxed.

    Then I started doing morning breathing meditations and mind-clearings.

    Things started improving, clicking, happening.

    Then I started adding T’ai Chi body relaxation postures, and let me tell you, if you don’t have access to a masseuse, horse stance will relax and revitalize your body like nobody’s business.

    Things shifted into over-drive.

    It was like everything I learned was ‘allowed’ to ‘work’ now that I was relaxing a much higher amount of time and depth.

    Seriously, Mollie — This is fantastic, and thanks to Melody for hosting. You both rock!

    • Hey Jason,

      Wow. I’m glad you liked this guest post so much. 🙂

      I often find that the most intellectual of people (and I attract a lot of them here) overthink things WAY too much. We have to learn to surrender, let go, relax instead of trying to make it happen. I think frequent reminders of this are really helpful.

      Huge hugs!

  • Avatar Kat says:

    Yup, what a fab post reminding us of the most important thing in LOA- chill, release your hold over stuff and stop worrying because it will be taken care of one way or another without your pesky prodding 🙂

  • Avatar Steve Rice says:

    This is a great post. Succinct and to-the-point! Thanks for inviting Molly in, Melody.

    I’ve experienced the same things. The parts of my life that have manifested “miraculously” have been with the least amount of effort and with the greatest ease. I literally “allowed” them to fall into place.

    It’s difficult to explain to someone “how” to do this, though, because then we create a task…a magic formula, if you will…to ensure the objective we’ve set.

    Over the past few months, I’ve experienced deep dissatisfaction with my work situation. I’ve created a lot of anxiety about it. Finally over the past few weeks, I surrendered it. Meaning, I detached my intention from the outcome. I’ve been spending more intention and focus in relaxed mediation and what I call “gratitude” walks which allow me to feel good.

    The most difficult part of the process now is just the trust that everything will work out because I’m doing so little to directly impact the outcome. Don’t get me wrong, I’m still taking action, but I’m no longer emotionally tied to the outcome of the action.

    • Thanks Steve! I’m glad you enjoyed it.

      Letting go and surrendering to the process can be so scary, can’t it? Our minds go crazy thinking we ought to be doing something. But when we take the time to line up our energy, we ARE doing something. One of the greatest lies we ever told ourselves is that life has to be hard and nothing worth having comes easy. BS.

      Huge hugs!

  • Thanks guys, for the support! It’s not just me (and us) that has experienced this, either. I’ve been getting a lot of LOA stories come through my blog and it really seems like it’s never the repeated mantras that work; it’s always the “oh, I forgot about this, and then suddenly I had it” that does. Which makes sense, actually. I’m just now reading “Conversations With God, Part Three” and in it God says that the whole point of all three dialogues is that we stop TRYING to be/do this or that, and we just BE/DO it. Deep, deep stuff . . . And I definitely haven’t grasped it completely yet . . .

  • Avatar Derrek says:

    Awesome article, Mollie! I totally agree with the concept, too. It really clicked for me when I read it in Melody’s ‘You Get What You Want, Not What You Need’ article, and this piece from you acted as a very good reminder of that. I admit, I was losing track of it for a while. I guess it’s just the way the mind works; to always try and explain things through logic and obsess over the unknown.

    LOA should be effortless, lighthearted, and free-flowing. It shouldn’t be a burden or a bargain with the Universe.

    Again, really good stuff. Resonated with me perfectly, and makes complete sense. Thanks, Mollie! Also, love Stories and Truth. Added it to my Bookmarks, will be checking it out often from now on. 🙂

  • Great post! Relaxing and detaching as so essential. The process of trying to force something (thru LOA or whatever) works under the assumption that the thing doesn’t exist. Needing something and thinking about how much we need it assumes we don’t have it so we’re feeding the “don’t have it” energy.

    I started a new practice recently. Instead of asking what I need to do to manifest something (other than meditating on it), I ask myself who I need to be and what kind of daily habits a person who already has that thing would practice. Then I do my best to be that person and adopt those habits. This keeps my focus on what I can control instead of what I don’t have. Then I trust the Universe to pull all the pieces together in the perfect way. And relaxing is a big part of all that.

    Thanks for the great post Mollie and Melody!

  • Today, taking my own advice, I’m working on meditating and staying relaxed rather than doing repeated affirmations. I think this is going to be a wonderful thing for a worrier like me…

  • Thank you, Mollie!!
    Love this! And love the simplicity of it, too. I”ll apply it to my own life.

  • love this and so agree with you! Effortless is my style;)

  • Avatar Vidya Sury says:

    Ah, yes. I need easy right now. 🙂 Thanks Mollie and Melody (I feel like writing a story around that)!

    Love, Vidya

  • My favorite affirmation so far is: “I live in the easy world, where everything is easy.” There is a book about this affirmation called “Choosing the Easy World.” Great title, huh?

  • Avatar Lauren says:

    Dear Melody,

    The job I got back in Mar which I wrote you about (writing a letter the Universe that worked perfectly) went away when the college went down in flames for breaking Federal financial aid laws – they enrolled kids who didn’t possess HS diplomas/GEDs and received government student loan money for them. I’ve been out of work for 6 weeks now and at the beginning of July I received my final paycheck from them.

    Since then I’ve been going through basically a depressed funk, spending most of my time sleeping, not taking care of chores around the house, not looking for a new job, dwelling on an ex-friendship that has completely ended at the same time for some unknown reasons.

    However, while I spend copious amounts of time in my bed, I occasionally run through my mind the mantra, “Money is coming to me. Money is coming to me in unexpected ways”. Sometimes I’ll even envision a dump truck full of cash dumping on me. LOL

    Well, today I unexpectedly received mail from the college. I had no idea what it could have been. I opened it up and found a hand written check in there for over $500! No note, no explanation written on the check as to what it was for (I’m guessing severance pay). Of course I was overjoyed by this and immediately ran to the bank. 🙂

    It was later in the evening I remembered that my mantra had happened. Money did come to me in an unexpected way. Now I realize that some people would say it was just coincidence. And I have to wonder if this check would have shown up whether I had recited the mantra or not. But I figure it didn’t hurt to do so, and maybe in the future, it might hurt NOT to do so.

    Anyway, thought I’d share another one of my latest stories. I always enjoy reading your articles. Keep up the good work.


    p.s. Instead of looking for employment here where I live, I’ve recently applied for my passport. I saw an ad to teach ESL in Korea and thought it was a good time to explore my options abroad since I’ve been wanting to get out of the US for years. I’m anxious to experience other cultures and people. I haven’t settled on a specific position since there are so many places I could teach English. I’ve even looked into Italy. 😉 I’ve set my intention to go where I can grow the most spiritually and personally – so it’s in the Universe’s hands now.

    • Hey Lauren,

      That’s awesome!!! Thanks so much for sharing this story here! Of course you manifested that money, and the mantra didn’t hurt (it’s impossible to tell if you would’ve been aligned with it anyway…)

      And now this dream of traveling the world resurfaces with an idea on how to make it happen? Hmmmm. Sounds to me like you’re being pulled toward what you really wanted all along, eh? Gotta love the Universe.

      Huge hugs!

  • Avatar Becca says:

    When i read “Law of Attraction” it lifts my spirit, inspire me, giving me hope
    and teaches me to stay positive.

  • Avatar Petecito says:

    Another work of art, Melody, thanks for letting others in on the game, only builds on the magic!

    I’m an intellectual(!), too, and have had some early successes and of course I know how it all works, oh yeah, until the magic starts drying up. I had a hard time accepting the slacker mentality, the relaxing, etc. as a way to get what you want until it dawned on me that this is how you would be when you got what you wanted. You’re relaxing, lightening up and there’s the matching of the energy that brings the bounty forth.

    Shouldn’t I be doing more? is what plagues the task-oriented, too, and it helped me enormously to realise I’m doing the hardest work of all: using my mind to sift through what I don’t want, want more of and be conscious as much as possible.

    Fantastic, love coming here!

    • Hey Petecito,

      Thanks so much. I love having guest bloggers. I just have really high standards (only the best for you guys!). But I’m always happy to take the day off, LOL.

      You’re so right! What would we be doing if we had accomplished what we wanted to do? We’d be relaxing and living the good life. And yet, when we bring those elements into our NOW, we feel guilty and like we’re not doing enough. That discomfort is a sign of resistance and something that will keep us from reaching our goals. We have to be comfortable enjoying the fruits of our labor, before the fruits come and even if there wasn’t so much labor. My vision is to have a team of people to do everything I don’t absolutely enjoy doing (so basically everything but the coaching and writing and interacting with readers in the comments). Well, that means that I won’t be all that busy. If I can’t enjoy myself unless I’ve worked my butt off, then I’m not ready to play at that level of ease.

      Isn’t that a wonderful insight??

      Huge hugs!!!
      (And we love you coming here!!!)


  • Avatar janet says:

    i think this is true and i’ll go even further and say that TOO much focus isn’t really doing it ‘right’. law of attraction should seem effortless.. when it works, it flows. it shouldn’t be something that’s “hard” and the moment you think that, or bring energy into that, it might just elude you.

  • Hi Mollie,

    What happens when someone is “asking too hard” is that instead of attracting what they want they are actually creating a resistance. Thus, instead of attracting they are repulsing.

    You are completely right. If we want to attract we need to relax. Franckly my experience has shown that you don’t attact just because you need it or not, you can well be attracting money even if you don’t need it at all, it’s all about your beliefs and the type of resistance you are putting out there.

    Thanks for your great insights, Mollie 🙂

  • Avatar Felicita H. says:

    Well said! I definitely need some relaxation right now. I seem to be running into brick wall after brick wall and even praying seems impossible at times. Only because I feel it will not make a difference, that’s how bad things have been for me lately. After reading this my outlook has slightly changed and I plan to give it another go. Thank you!!

  • Why is relaxing so important? Relaxing is a key ingredient to making the LOA work. I have coached thousands of people on how to do this and have worked directly with many people on the movie The Secret. One of the biggest problems people have is that they just flat out try too hard. They swing so hard at the ball that they miss it all together. Learning to relax and let it go is how you get into what I call the flow. The flow can help you do so many things in your life and open up your mind to a whole new world. When you are in the flow you can do incredible things. I never thought I would write a book but when I relaxed and let it come to me it was easy! The Secrets of as A Man Thinketh is what came of it. MY FIRST BOOK! The LOA is incredible if you simply master it!

  • DO LESS, NOT MORE is so hard to remember in this “driven” world. Thanks for sharing so beautifully, so simply (you have a gift for that!) how to do it.

  • Avatar Sameer says:

    Hey Mollie Player,

    I Loved this and was looking for too… Thank you so much!

    Thanks Melody for sharing this with us.

    Happy n Relaxed Hugs,

  • Avatar Steve says:

    In regards to having trust in LOA, I was wondering….how long did it take you (Mollie or Melody) to not have any doubts about the law & fully believe it? I feel like sometimes even though I believe it when I think about it, it’s still hard for me to grasp it automatically all the time. I guess part of it is because so many people still don’t follow it or believe in it so it’s not being reinforced and also, because it’s a process of shifting my beliefs. I’ve even pointed out past situations & new situations that I believe came from LOA. I’ve definitely made progress, but I feel like my thoughts would be so much more powerful & effortless if I accepted it like the law of gravity for instance. I want to have absolute faith & relax, but I still don’t feel there yet after several months of familiarity. Still grateful to be in the process though.

    • Hey Steve,

      I can’t speak for Mollie but for me, it’s been a gradual, ongoing process and it’s still going. I continuously “get” this stuff on deeper and deeper levels. I did have a sort of moment, where the scale tipped and I really understood that this stuff is real. But that wasn’t the end of it. Situation by situation, I learned to apply LOA, test it and tweak it and understand it further. I inundated myself with LOA materials, that helped a lot. But ultimately, it still took time. And like I said, the process continues.

      As you apply LOA deliberately to your life over and over, your understanding and belief will grow. You’ll care less about whether or not others get it, and more about how you feel. It’s a lot to ask to defy conventional wisdom like this, and your belief will have it’s strong and weaker moments, but as you do this work, you will continue to deepen your understanding.

      It’s not an all or nothing thing. Give yourself a bit of a break. It’s a bit like learning to play an instrument. First, you get proficient at it. You have. Then, you keep getting better and better. Even masters are always striving to get better. 🙂

      Huge hugs!

      • Avatar Steve says:

        Great! Thanks Melody. It is true. We can be hard on ourselves. I will continue to embrace the process & focus on getting better 🙂

  • Avatar lili says:

    I’m sorry, just read this post. So what are you saying, that you didn’t get the money because you didn’t need it?

  • Avatar wendy says:

    Hi love the stories that people sent to you. I had few little things happen but for the big ones are a lot harder for me. I guest i try to hard, like you say i should be more relax. Ihave been trying to attract the perfect house for that i can afford easely. What is the best way to do this. I know how i want my house to be… ect. Pls let me now what i ca do to make it more easier. thank you in advance.

    WENDY, 🙂

  • Avatar NJ says:

    Thank you! Exactly the post I was looking for. I keep wondering why the things I am not focusing a ton of time on are showing up and the ones I been focusing on keep not showing up. haha I know my emotions are guiding me toward what I want, but I keep the thought in my head all day, perhaps I should just let it go and be.

  • Avatar Damien (a girl) says:

    Neat article, and true. Although I have been experiencing trouble using the Law of Attraction for romance and relationships lately, I’m a snap at using it for money and other things. I think it’s because I perceive money as abundant and ever-flowing, but when it comes to men, I’m picky, have been disillusioned, and don’t trust much. I’ll work on that. But this morning, the LOA worked well as usual on something:

    I’ve wanted a specific kind of table for my apartment, and I put it in my mind, kind of “made a note” to get one somehow, in a calm and comfortable way, then put it out of my mind.

    This morning, just a few days after making that mental note, I went outside my apartment to toss the garbage and noticed, by the drop-off, the exact type of table that I wanted. I pulled it into my apartment, and here it is. Voila. Perfect table 🙂

    If only I could do that to replace a rotten ex-boyfriend I’m finally over. The bad boy is out, and now there’s a vacuum waiting to be filled by a great new guy. I kind of think I “need” that vacuum filled straightaway… therein probably lies the problem.

    Thanks for an awesome LOA article!

  • Avatar snigdha says:

    I am a big fan of the LOA and in total awe! This is the best thing I have learnt and experienced in my life. I would like to know how can I make my partner believe in it too? I did make him watch a few videos but he thinks its too good to be true so I did not push further. I simply let go. Do I visualize and affirm that he believes in LOA too or I actually coax him to read stuff himself.
    Please suggest!
    Thank You!!

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